My new guilty pleasure is...

MADATOMS. Here's a little gem from their website:

http://www.madatoms.com/site/blog/what-kind-of-racist-are-you/

It is LOVE.

Today I'm going to be a stereotype...

My inspiration: www.asianposes.com

And to think, I overlooked the V sign...what could I have possibly been thinking? While these poses may look easy to the untrained eye, if you look closely I'm grimacing a little in each one. Looking like an anime character does not come naturally to me. Applying heinous amounts of black eyeliner wasn't very pleasant either. Oh well, all in a day's work for Jess.

From left to right: Claw #1, Okay #1, Okay #2, Nyan Nyan, Bang, Call Me, Punch to the Face, Claw #2, Adjusting Glasses

PS: This is probably the most self-absorbed I get, next to posting a huge picture of myself as my blog masthead. teehee.

PPS: Blog masthead explanation post (Halloween post) coming soon to a browser near you...

She's got a face not worth remembering...

Want a quick and surefire way to make a person feel insignificant? Tell them their face is indistinguishable from four billion others. While you're at it, go ahead and tell them that their facial features and placement are nothing special, just another casting of an overused mold.

What kind of audacity would a person have to possess in order to say such a thing? Maybe I'm being a bit hyperbolic with the above example but hyperboles prove points and I am on a point-proving mission (along with a save the world mission).

Stop telling me you think all Asians look alike.

First off, if you genuinely believe we all look alike, this subject matter should not be used as an icebreaker. I will judge you if you use this to start off a conversation. I may even resent you for the rest of your life. If you have to rely on such shoddy material in order to begin a conversation, I would say a lesson on social skills should be in order.

Boy: Hi
Jess: Hi
Boy: What are you? [refer to my earlier post entitled "Where are you from?"]
Jess: (reluctantly and while rolling her eyes) Chinese (I would usually say something wittier or possibly even snippier but for time's sake sometimes I like to cut to the chase)
Boy: Ya'll look alike! Can't tell you apart!
Jess: Whew, I'm glad we got that out of the way. I always hate all these social formalities we have to uphold. Thanks for blurting out the first thing that came to your mind, seriously, thank you...I feel so much more comfortable around you.
Boy: You're welcome.

Social psychology explains the phenomenon (though I don't really consider it much of a phenomenon) of being able to more easily recognize facial differences between those of your own race versus those of another. I love social psychology; it takes simple adages that everyone takes for granted and performs scientific experiments in order to prove or disprove the adages' validity. Take the commonly used aphorism: absence makes the heart grow fonder. Is this statement true or false? Some would say, "It's all subjective, you can't really tell; social psychologists say, "Let's make up an experiment!" Sometimes the results seem to be what I like to call 'duh-statements'; I could have told you that without you going off and spending a thousand dollars developing an experiment. Other times the results are truly shocking and unexpected. As for whether or not absence makes the heart grow fonder...it doesn't (Diamond, 2008). Okay, enough rambling about my love of social psychology. Here are some key points about our ability to recognize faces within our own race:

Malpass and Kravi (1969) were the first to empirically demonstrate that the identification of a face is more frequently correct when the face belongs to one's own ethnic group compared to a face from another ethnic group. They first showed 20 slides to white and black subjects. Ten of these slides showed white faces, the other ten showed black faces. Subjects were then presented with a second series of 80 slides, 40 of which showed black faces, and the other 40 white faces. The first 20 slides had been included in these series. For each slide subjects were asked whether they had seen that particular slide before.

On the basis of their findings Malpass and Kravi (1969) arrived at the following conclusion: "subjects were found to have higher acuity for faces of own race" (p.330). Their results, however, show that this phenomenon mainly occurs in whites identifying black faces. White subjects recognize black faces less accurately while whites recognized the white faces more frequently than the black faces, while black subjects recognized the black and white faces with equal facility" (p. 393).

To explain the phenomenon that blacks recognize faces of a different ethnic origin more easily than whites it is often said that blacks have more experience with individuals of a different ethnic origin than whites (Brigham & Malpass, 1985; Bothwell, Brigham & Malpass, 1989). Experiences with other ethnic groups increase the familiarity with 'other faces', which has a positive effect on valid and reliable facial description.

If you have issues with differentiating one person from another in the same race category I would encourage you to increase your experiences with those of other races. Another suggestion would be to increase eye contact when speaking to others and pay attention to tier facial features. Too often I see members of our generation failing to provide adequate eye contact while conversing with others. Look at the person while you're speaking to them but steer clear from actually appearing to study out their face. No creepers please!

So the next time you think about blurting out how all us Asians be looking alike, remember that we can't tell you people apart either.

PS: The above statement makes more sense when you consider that Asians are a very exclusive people. Many of the Chinese students I conversed with had never seen a black person in the flesh. Lack of experience=inability to differentiate.

Japanese Domo-Kun and Chinese Jie-ling have some noticeable differences

Diamond, L., Hicks, A., & Otter-Henderson, K. (2008). Every time you go away: Changes in affect, behavior, and physiology associated with travel-related separations from romantic partners. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 95 (2), 385-403

Vrig, A., & Winkel, F.W. (1989). Recognition of own and other-race faces: The effects of quality versus quantity of cross-cultural interaction. Journal of Police and Criminal Psychology, 5 (2), 24-28

You ungrateful little punks...[edited for errors and spellchecked]

When choosing a blog title I always start with something completely over the top and eventually decide to dilute it. While hoping to make it as attention grabbing as possible, and the initial title of this blog was very attention grabbing indeed, I figured the insertion of swear words was not fully necessary. I don't want to offend the reader before the start of the entry, only afterward...yes, my posts aim to give you a bad aftertaste. Now onto more important matters...

There will be pandemonium on the streets of Provo and Orem come this November. Here's to being one of the few that will not be participating.

Utah County does not deserve an In & Out. The following essay will attempt to explain why.

Why Utah County Does Not Deserve an In & Out
by Jessica Y.

I started off this post with an assumption that In & Out will create some commotion upon opening. Let me make myself clear: this commotion will not be caused by the residents of Utah County but will be instigated by the many California-ers and Vegas-ites (and Arizonians, must I not forget) that have relocated to Utah for various reasons. It is these pioneers who have demanded that quality be something you can taste in burger form. It is these forefathers that recognized the dire need for a burger joint that fully satisfied their carnivorous cravings, who recognized that such a place existed but only outside of Utah. It is the ingrates in Utah County that will be reaping the rewards of OUR benevolence and OUR willingness to share the pinnacle of burger perfection. We have labored long and hard, petitioning the great burger gods to grace us with the meaty, juicy goodness that was once ours. The time is coming, the day is dawning...In & Out is setting up shop in the UC.

Utah County-ers who have experienced In & Out commonly diss on its lack of burger merits. I've heard one too many UCers express their general dislike of In & Out and its failure to impress them. My response immediately follows: sheer and utter disgust for a waste of faulty tastebuds on a tongue. Are you for reals? No seriously, ARE YOU FO' REALS?!?!?! We've got facebook groups devoted to In & Out with fans that are willing to drive from Provo to Washington City, Utah in order to eat a burger!!! Have you ever heard of another burger place generating that kind of devotion, that kind of fandom?

This is why In & Out burgers reign supreme:
Bun-perfection
Lettuce-perfection
Tomato-perfection
Meat-perfection
Cheese-perfection
Onion-perfection and also offered "animal style"
Special sauce-perfection

Furthermore, Utah County is oversaturated with burger joints: JCWs, Burger Supreme, Chadder's (an In & Out impostor), 5 Guys (all of which I have been to and later regretted). There is never a shortage of burgers in the UC. UC thinks it doesn't need another burger place; they think they have all the burger joints they could ever possibly want or need. They are satisfied with their overabundance of sub-par establishments and have no more room in their hearts to accept anything beyond mediocrity.

Finally, warm weather is a must for In & Out to thrive. For goodness sakes, there are red palm trees printed on their cups and on the outside decor. Have you ever seen a palm tree in the UC? When I think of In & Out I think of California casual, flip-flops and short-shorts. It will be incredibly bizarre to behold an In & Out covered in snow, patrons huddled up inside for warmth from the blistering cold.

So in short, I will not be celebrating with the non-UCers who finally had their prayers answered mainly because I do not support an In & Out being opened in a place ridden with ingrates. I will also not forgive those UC-ers who repent of their wicked ways and discover they were oh-so-wrong and I, along with 50 bajillion other people, were oh-so-right.

Man, if my rhetoric teacher (who is imaginary) ever read this argument he would probably shake his head and look severely disappointed. I don't care. I'd tell him to go eat an In & Out burger and leave me alone.

Thought for the day...

I will not be an afterthought.

I know I haven't blogged in ages...I feel guilty. Really cool blog posts forthcoming, sorry for the lack of a better superlative. ; )

I just like to hear myself blog...

This post probably belongs in my epicuriousinprovo.com blog but since that enterprising project went down the fecal matter hole it looks like it will find a home here.

Provo needs a good teriyaki place. I find that in order to get decent teriyaki you must venture into sit-down restaurants with geisha attire wearing waitresses which can often be pricey. There is also Teriyaki Stix which I will sometimes frequent in order to fix an insatiable need for teriyaki. It takes an overpowering delirium (usually brought on by my lack of teriyaki bowls) which drives me to step foot in the establishment. The bowls at Teriyaki Stix are pre-made and only receive a quick zapping in the microwave before serving. The lack of preparation is obvious as you dabble through scant amounts of bland chicken and vegetables coupled with an unproportional amount of teriyaki sauce that overwhelms and stifles the rice from ever fully expressing itself. Notice how I just anthropomophized rice, a feat definitely worth noting.

In short, you're left wondering why you even went in the first place.

I miss the dismally dirty teriyaki venues at home. I miss the fact that they're a fusion of Asian fares: Chinese, Japanese, Korean. Kimchee with your beef bowl? No problem! I also miss the fact that I can hear more than just a microwave buzzing as the cooks make my meal to order. Nom, nom, nom.

So I've decided if all other plans fall through, ie. teaching English in China; finding a respectable job, I'll open up a teriyaki place. I've already come up with the name, "JessYaki" and the slogan, "Get your yaki on!" Because honestly, if a place like Provo/Orem can get a good pho place (plug for Pho Noodle House on State St.) it's about time they got a good teriyaki place.

JESSYAKI YA'LL! COMING TO PROVO WHENEVER JESSICA FIGURES OUT SHE CAN'T FIND A JOB.

Paisley Pink Boutique

My very creative & industrious sister in law just started up a business (Go Jamie!):

http://www.paisleypinkboutique.blogspot.com/

Would <3 you if you took a looksie.